Get Ready To Never, Ever Stop Hearing About Hillary Clinton’s Failing Health

Dear God: Donald Trump being right about this might very well be the last straw for us

So this happened today:

That would be Hillary Clinton feeling “overheated,” according to her press secretary, at a September 11 memorial service in New York on Sunday morning and not suffering from the health problems she has been relentlessly accused of having by Donald Trump and his gimp. Trump, incidentally, has cancelled multiple rallies without explanation and has released no credible medical records of his own. Of course, neither has Clinton – and apparently neither plan to as both remain exceptionally secretive about their physical fitness to lead the free world.

Clinton, mostly through her campaign because she almost never talks to the press herself (which remains a great strategy when everybody thinks you’re always hiding something), has dismissed the charges, but fair or not neither of those approaches are likely to fly any longer. Tomorrow would probably be a great time to invite some cameras to her 7 a.m. Jazzercise class.

It’s also worth noting that, lost in the swirling clusterfuck of us managing to nominate the two most disliked candidates in history for president, we’ve also managed to nominate one who would be the oldest person to ever become Commander in Chief and another who would be second-oldest. Trump, who is 70, would be even older than Ronald Reagan was when Reagan when he was inaugurated in 1981, and Clinton, will be 69 in October, is close behind.

You’re already great, America. Don’t let anybody tell you different.

*Update* Hillary Clinton was diagnosed with pneumonia on Friday, according to her doctor. People Clinton’s age often take weeks to recover – with adequate rest.