Yankees Fan Should Have Spent Less On Front Row, More On Baseball Lessons

Renewing His Man Card Will Cost More Than Getting Those Sweet Seats Again

Everyone secretly hates the rich guy on the front row at a baseball game. This apparently includes the baseball gods, who decided to give New York Yankees fan Will Smith a wedgie on front of 40,000 people at Yankee Stadium last September.

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Damn you, sailing camp!

Sitting in prime real estate just down the third-base line, Smith gets not one, not two, but three chances to fulfill every guy’s fantasy and impress a chick by snagging a foul ball at a big league game. Instead of getting signed and/or laid, however, the depth perception of a 2-year-old combined with the defensive mechanics of someone who works on a beach ball assembly line to produce a horrifying sequence that started with a popup off his hands (which, remarkably, was the the only time they were directly involved) before things devolved into a ground ball off his sternum and a gentle toss from the pitying third base coach that somehow ricocheted off his face.

Smith was like Les Nessman, without the natural athletic ability.

 

In an interview with Esquire, Smith took the high road and blamed losing the ball in the lights, a bad hop and a poor throw for his one-man tribute to The Three Stooges. Seriously.